There will be days where the magical joy of motherhood will be ruthlessly tested by your sweet and loving child. It will be one of those days that all the plans are tossed out the window due to the fact that your toddler is throwing an uncontrollable tantrum and leaving the house at the moment is not the best idea. Siblings are sparring so intensely you want to send them to different countries let alone different rooms. Up to this point in motherhood, you have repeated the same line at least five thousand times. Words like “gentle”,
“inside voice”, “potty” and especially “no” have found a regular rotation in your dialogue. It has been one of those days where you are counting your hours to bedtime. This is it. You are about to go NUCLEAR on everyone. Here are a few disarming ideas to hopefully keep the volcano from exploding.
Take a Mommy Break
It could be as easy as taking a breath, taking a walk or quite possibly take a nap. A twenty-minute nap may be all you need to give you that extra boost to finish the challenging day. Maybe you need some alone time? Call up a girlfriend and go see a flick that will pull you away from the stress of the day. Maybe a little shopping therapy will rejuvenate you back into a happy mommy state. Mothering is more than a full-time job. It is seven days a week from the moment that your little one awakes with a few nap breaks or quiet time until they rest their little head one your shoulder. It is important to recharge your batteries so that you can be the best mommy to those amazing children.
You are not alone
It is so easy in the day-to-day to think that you are the only one whose child has not mastered potty training. The only one whose child has not walked, not talked or mastered the art of controlling their emotional land scape. The only one who has children who act out beyond belief in public, have bad attitudes and display a huge amount of ungratefulness. But the truth is that you are not alone. Many times I have found when I open up with another mom, I find that they are either going through the same thing or they have already gone through. This conversation alone gives me the much-needed wisdom to get through the day. There is something completely comforting to know that you are not only one in the world. So, pick up that phone and call a friend. It could be your lifeline for the day.
Remember the good moments
Maybe it is time to pull out the old movies or pictures and remember that sweet one’s smile. A good reminder is inspiration to stop yourself from pulling out all the hair from your head. A friend of mine passed along this great article Don’t Carpe Diem. My favorite part from the article is:
There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.
Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. It’s those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.
Like when I actually stop what I’m doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is. I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can’t hear her because all I can think is — This is the first time I’ve really seen Tish all day, and my God — she is so beautiful. Kairos.
The author does a fantastic job in acknowledging the tough part of being a mom, but also inspires to look for those tiny moments that you want to freeze in time. If those moments do not happen on the day in question, pull out a video or a picture that reminds you of the joy of having such beautiful children.
Being a mom can be tough, but know this that even if you don’t feel like it. You are doing a great job!